SelfAssessPoehnert

Jeremy Poehnert

June 2012

I. "MY SYNTHESIS PRODUCT SHOWS THAT..." 1) I can convey who I want to influence/affect concerning what (Subject, Audience, Purpose).
a) something that reflects what you have achieved well related to this goal
It took me a long time, but I think the goal of my project eventually became clear; provide those leading higher education cocurricular civic engagement programs with tools to help them approach the issue of student learning in a realistic and strategic way. It sounds so simple now, but moving from my original ideas to this final focus was definitely a journey. Along the way I learned a lot about combining my personal interests with the huge range of potential resources I could use in order to, eventually, craft a final product with a clear focus.
b) something you have struggled with/need more help on/want to work further on.
Ideally I would have liked to get more feedback from members of my target audience during the process of writing this synthesis. Instead I focused on the research/writing, and never took the next step of soliciting feedback from people in the field, to find out if they see value in the ideas/models I'm presenting. I hope to conduct that outreach moving forward. 2) I know what others have done before, either in the form of writing or action, that informs and connects with my project, and I know what others are doing now.
a) something that reflects what you have achieved well related to this goal.
It feels strange for me to say this, but I think it's true – in terms of the topic of learning outcomes from cocurricular civic engagement in higher education, I think I know as much as anyone in the field, with the exception of a small circle of actual experts. Of
course, this is a fairly specific subject, and the number of people interested in it is relatively small. But unless I missed some huge body of literature, I know the basic issues involved with this topic better than most practitioners in the field. Of course, my knowledge falls far short of that of the true experts, those researchers and thinkers that lead the field.
b) something you have struggled with/need more help on/want to work further on.
Although I think it's technically true, it's still hard for me to really believe in my “expertise.” I've always thought of myself as being good at running programs, as a “practitioner,” versus someone who is familiar with the theory and concepts behind the work. Hopefully, if my efforts to get feedback from others in the field validates my ideas (see question 1 above) I'll feel more confident in my knowledge – at the same time, of course, I know I still have a lot to learn.
3) I have teased out my vision, so as to expand my view of issues associated with the project, expose possible new directions, clarify direction/scope within the larger set of issues, and decide the most important direction.
a) something that reflects what you have achieved well related to this goal.
This project went through constant cycles of expansion and contraction in the scope of what it would cover. At one point I was focused on a very specific topic (using learning objectives), at another point I was trying to include every tool I'd ever learned from the CCT program (and beyond), while also touching on every aspect of student learning and program assessment possible. Ultimately, that broad vision was too ambitious. In the end I feel generally satisfied with my attempt to address most of the topics (learning, assessment, planning, etc.), and that I was able to touch on the core issues in a way that was useful. b) something you have struggled with/ need more help on/ want to work further on.
Having said that I'm generally satisfied, there is one big area I didn't reach. I had hoped to include a section in my synthesis presenting various tools I'd learned from the CCT program (and other places) that would be directly applicable to my project. Ultimately I wasn't able to actually put that section together. I hope to return to that later. 4) I have identified the premises and propositions that my project depends on, and can state counter-propositions. I have taken stock of the thinking and research I need to do to counter those counter-propositions or to revise my own propositions.
a) something that reflects what you have achieved well related to this goal
Part of my approach to this synthesis was to clearly ground my ideas in established concepts of best practice for the various fields involved (student affairs, civic engagement, student learning theories, learning objectives and assessment being the major examples). My hope was that doing so meant it would be clear that my proposals are a natural extension of established, foundational concepts, and, hence, hard to refute.
b) something you have struggled with/need more help on/want to work further on.
Although I think that the theoretical aspects of my project (student affairs, civic engagement, program planning, learning objectives and assessment) are on fairly safe ground, being based on concepts on which there is a fair amount of consensus, there is one, huge, untested argument in my synthesis. I argue that the four part planning model I'm proposing will be both practical and effective for programs to use. But I haven't actually tested the model; until I've seen it in action I can't be sure how it will work. So actually implementing the model will be a major future step for me to take.
5) I have clear objectives with respect to product, both written and practice, and process, including personal development as a reflective practitioner. I have arranged my work in a sequence (with realistic deadlines) to realize these objectives.
a) something that reflects what you have achieved well related to this goal.
At least from my point of view, my synthesis has a clear objective - to offer tools to help programs in the target audience set and reach learning outcomes for students – and makes a legitimate effort to reach that objective. As part of that process I was also able to include important issues and resources that I think said programs should at least be familiar with.
b) something you have struggled with/ need more help on/ want to work further on.
I am far from having a good process for doing academic work. Writing academic papers has always been really, really hard for me. I have improved a lot thanks to the CCT program; finishing the synthesis is major evidence of that! But I still have a long way to go before I have an effective process for writing academic papers. 6) I have gained direct information, models, and experience not readily available from other sources.
a) something that reflects what you have achieved well related to this goal.
Similar to my answer for question two, unless I've missed something, no one else has put together a resource like my synthesis, something that specifically puts together tools to help cocurricular civic engagement programs set and reach learning outcomes for students. Others have written about setting and reaching learning outcomes for other kinds of cocurricular activities, but not specifically for civic engagement projects.
b) something you have struggled with/ need more help on/ want to work further on.
Again, it's hard for me to give myself credit for coming up with something unique, to really believe in my research and writing abilities. Hopefully continuing to pursue the subject will help me with this, both by demonstrating the value of my work, thus allowing me to truly feel confident in it, and/or supplementing my work with tools/models I haven't discovered up to this point. 7) I have clarified the overall progression or argument underlying my research and the written reports.
a) something that reflects what you have achieved well related to this goal.
I tried to offer a consistent structure in my synthesis that started with foundational concepts and consistently returned to concepts introduced earlier in the paper. For instance, I introduce key concepts about student learning, and then revisit those concepts as part of the planning model I propose. I also introduce key questions/criteria early in the paper, and come back to those questions/criteria in the conclusion, reflecting on whether or not what I proposed answers said questions and meets said criteria.
b) something you have struggled with/ need more help on/ want to work further on.
I didn't satisfy all of the criteria I set earlier in the paper. That missing piece is something I hope to return to over time. 8) My writing and other products Grab the attention of the readers/audience, Orient them, move them along in Steps, so they appreciate the Position I've led them to.
a) something that reflects what you have achieved well related to this goal.
This is a hard point to address. I've been thinking about this synthesis for a long time, and it seems clear and interesting to me. It's hard for me to step back and see it how others might experience the synthesis. But I think it addresses issues that are interesting and relevant to my
target audience. Although neither of them are actually in my target audience, both my editor and advisor seem to feel that my synthesis meets a certain base standard for being clear and interesting.
b) something you have struggled with/ need more help on/ want to work further on.
I haven't had a chance to get feedback from anyone in my actual target audience yet. I hope to do that in the near future. That will give me concrete feedback on how clear and engaging the project is for my primary constituents. 9) I have facilitated new avenues of classroom, workplace, and public participation.
a) something that reflects what you have achieved well related to this goal.
One of the ideas I included in my synthesis that I have found covered in relatively few other places is the importance of involving all of the constituencies involved with HECE programs (especially students and community partners) in the process of supporting student learning. Most of the materials I reviewed focused on program leaders (usually faculty or staff) in identifying and supporting student learning. One of the ideas I'm hoping to reinforce is that HECE programs are based on partnerships, and that means that all of the partners have some role to play in supporting student learning.
b) something you have struggled with/ need more help on/ want to work further on.
I introduce the idea that various constituencies should be involved, but only in a vague way. That is something I hope build on over time. 10) To feed into my future learning and other work, I have taken stock of what has been working well and what needs changing.
a) something that reflects what you have achieved well related to this goal.
This is a hard question to answer, because I feel like everything about CCT encourages me to take stock of what is working and where to improve! In terms of a specific achievement, the fact that I was able to complete a synthesis still blows my mind. Doing so required me to come to terms with both my anxiety/depression and my general struggles with self management. Being able to get to this point feels like a huge accomplishment.
b) something you have struggled with/ need more help on/ want to work further on.
I still have a looooong way to go. I was able to finish, but it took me much longer and was much messier than I wanted. I clearly still have a lot of room for improvement.
II. DEVELOPING AS A REFLECTIVE PRACTITIONER, INCLUDING TAKING INITIATIVE IN AND THROUGH RELATIONSHIPS 1) I have integrated knowledge and perspectives from CCT and other courses into my own inquiry and engagement in social and/or educational change.
a) something that reflects what you have achieved well related to this goal.
I started my synthesis with how CCT in general and individual CCT courses contributed to my project. That was just the tip of the iceberg; I could add infinitely more about what CCT has taught me about social and educational change.
b) something you have struggled with/ need more help on/ want to work further on.
One of the projects I want to do now that I've completed the program is spend the summer reflecting on what I've learned from CCT and how to that carry forward in my life. Specifically I plan to keep developing a CCT “reference card” system I started earlier in the program. 2) I have also integrated into my own inquiry and engagement the processes, experiences, and struggles of previous courses.
a) something that reflects what you have achieved well related to this goal.
I think this is asking me about courses previous to CCT? That's how I'll answer it anyway...My undergraduate major was organizational development, and I feel like it was a great lead in to both to CCT in general and my synthesis. Although I didn't write about it explicitly in my synthesis, seeds that were planted in my undergraduate major really bloomed during my CCT experience and my synthesis project.
b) something you have struggled with/ need more help on/ want to work further on.
I feel like it is so easy NOT to make time for reflective practice, to get so caught up in day-to-day demands that I forget how important reflective practice is. It will take constant vigilance to ensure I really stay true to the concept of reflective practice. 3) I have developed efficient ways to organize my time, research materials, computer access, bibliographies, etc.
a) something that reflects what you have achieved well related to this goal.
I have improved tremendously in this area. The biggest example of that is that I was able to keep track of my references and put together my works cited for my synthesis. In the past that process would have paralyzed me with anxiety.
b) something you have struggled with/ need more help on/ want to work further on.
Even though I have made great progress, I have certainly not mastered all of the research competencies. I was able to pull everything together enough to finish my synthesis, but the process was much more haphazard than I'd have liked. 4) I have experimented with new tools and experiences, even if not every one became part of my toolkit as a learner, teacher/facilitator of others, and reflective practitioner.
a) something that reflects what you have achieved well related to this goal.
Again, it's hard to pick just one example. Every CCT course presented me with the opportunity to add to my toolkit. From learning about dialogue methods, to formal research and writing, to new approaches to problem solving and group work, CCT has given me enough tools to start my own hardware store. Although in the case of CCT, instead of being a “store” it is more of a cross between a skillshare, swapmeet and communal studio, where everyone brings tools to share, trade and develop.
b) something you have struggled with/ need more help on/ want to work further on.
The large number of tools and lessons learned makes it hard to actively practice all of them. One of the goals for the “reference card” system I've been developing is to help me actively refer back to and use the various tools. 5) I have paid attention to the emotional dimensions of undertaking my own project but have found ways to clear away distractions from other sources (present & past) and not get blocked, turning apparent obstacles into opportunities to move into unfamiliar or uncomfortable territory.
a) something that reflects what you have achieved well related to this goal.
Again, the best example of this is that I finished the program at all. I have struggled with academic anxiety for a long time, and I still do, but as I moved through the CCT program I have slowly been able to manage it better.
b) something you have struggled with/ need more help on/ want to work further on.
Again, I have made improvements, but I am far from mastering the process. I imagine this will be a life-long issue, something I'll constantly be chipping away at. 6) I have developed peer and other horizontal relationships. I have sought support and advice from peers, and have given support and advice to them when asked for.
a) something that reflects what you have achieved well related to this goal.
One of the elements that makes CCT so special is the amazing students the program attracts. The creativity and insight of my peers in the program never ceased to inspire and encourage me. I always looked forward to attending class and working with my fellow students, and deeply appreciate the encouraging and supportive nature of the CCT community.
b) something you have struggled with/ need more help on/ want to work further on.
I know how easy it would be to drift away from the CCT community after I've graduated. I feel like most of the alumni I've spoken with say the same thing “I mean to come back more often BUT...” So I want to make a serious effort to stay connected to the program after I graduate. 7) I have taken the lead, not dragged my feet, in dialogue with my advisor and other readers. I didn't wait for the them to tell me how to solve an expository problem, what must be read and covered in a literature review, or what was meant by some comment I didn't understand. I didn't put off giving my writing to my advisor and other readers or avoid talking to them because I thought that they didn't see things the same way as I do.
a) something that reflects what you have achieved well related to this goal.
In the past (pre-CCT) when I'd get behind on academic projects I would give up and disappear, because I was too embarrassed and ashamed to face my faculty members. That is something I've largely been able to overcome in the CCT program. Even when I'm frustrated with myself for falling behind, I've still stayed engaged with the program and followed up with my faculty members.
b) something you have struggled with/ need more help on/ want to work further on.
Although I've stayed engaged, I wouldn't say I've “taken the lead.” There are plenty of times when I've fallen behind and/or generally not done the level of work I should be doing. I'm grateful that the CCT faculty have been so patient and supportive, and I know this is an area where I still have a lot of work to do.
8) I have revised seriously, which involved responding to the comments of others. I came to see this not as bowing down to the views of others, but taking them in and working them into my own reflective inquiry until I could convey more powerfully to others what I'm about (which may have changed as a result of the reflective inquiry).
a) something that reflects what you have achieved well related to this goal.
This has been pretty easy. Almost without exception I have found the feedback from the CCT faculty thoughtful, insightful and very helpful. Even when that feedback is challenging, it's clearly thoughtful, and comes from a place of goodwill. I have certainly always benefited from paying close attention the feedback I've received.
b) something you have struggled with/ need more help on/ want to work further on.
I wish I had been proactive about getting feedback from a range of people for my synthesis, and taken full advantage of the opportunities offered by having a second reader. 9) I have inquired and negotiated about formal standards, but gone on to develop and internalize my own criteria for doing work—criteria other than jumping through hoops set by the professor so I get a good grade.
a) something that reflects what you have achieved well related to this goal.
Throughout the CCT program I have felt very empowered to develop my own approach to my coursework, including my synthesis, as long as that work met a certain threshold of quality. CCT makes it very safe to experiment and explore different approaches, while also making it clear that students are expected to produce quality work.
b) something you have struggled with/ need more help on/ want to work further on.
There have been a number of projects in which I would have liked to take more ambitious and creative approaches, but wasn't able to because I wasn't organized enough. This is something I want to keep working on. 10) I have approached the CCT synthesis course and the CCT program as works-in- progress, which means that, instead of harboring criticisms to submit after the fact, I have found opportunities to affirm what is working well and to suggest directions for further development.
a) something that reflects what you have achieved well related to this goal.
I feel like the CCT program does any excellent job modeling the values of reflective practice, constantly reflecting on how it can continue to improve and develop. This had made it very easy to share my ideas and feedback.
b) something you have struggled with/ need more help on/ want to work further on.
I would like to use CCT's commitment to reflective practice as a model, both for my personal life, and for the organization's I'm a part of.

I. "MY SYNTHESIS PRODUCT SHOWS THAT..."

A. I can convey who I want to influence/affect concerning what (Subject, Audience, Purpose).




B. I know what others have done before, either in the form of writing or action, that informs and connects with my project, and I know what others are doing now.




C. I have teased out my vision, so as to expand my view of issues associated with the project, expose possible new directions, clarify direction/scope within the larger set of issues, and decide the most important direction.




D. I have identified the premises and propositions that my project depends on, and can state counter-propositions. I have taken stock of the thinking and research I need to do to counter those counter-propositions or to revise my own propositions.



E. I have clear objectives with respect to product, both written and practice, and process, including personal development as a reflective practitioner. I have arranged my work in a sequence (with realistic deadlines) to realize these objectives.




F. I have gained direct information, models, and experience not readily available from other sources.




G. I have clarified the overall progression or argument underlying my research and the written reports.




H. My writing and other products Grab the attention of the readers/audience, Orient them, move them along in Steps, so they appreciate the Position I've led them to.




I. I have facilitated new avenues of classroom, workplace, and public participation.




J. To feed into my future learning and other work, I have taken stock of what has been working well and what needs changing.

II. DEVELOPING AS A REFLECTIVE PRACTITIONER, INCLUDING TAKING INITIATIVE IN AND THROUGH RELATIONSHIPS

1. I have integrated knowledge and perspectives from CCT and other courses into my own inquiry and engagement in social and/or educational change.



2. I have also integrated into my own inquiry and engagement the processes, experiences, and struggles of previous courses.




3. I have developed efficient ways to organize my time, research materials, computer access, bibliographies, etc.



4. I have experimented with new tools and experiences, even if not every one became part of my toolkit as a learner, teacher/facilitator of others, and reflective practitioner.




5. I have paid attention to the emotional dimensions of undertaking my own project but have found ways to clear away distractions from other sources (present & past) and not get blocked, turning apparent obstacles into opportunities to move into unfamiliar or uncomfortable territory.




6. I have developed peer and other horizontal relationships. I have sought support and advice from peers, and have given support and advice to them when asked for.




7. I have taken the lead, not dragged my feet, in dialogue with my advisor and other readers. I didn't wait for the them to tell me how to solve an expository problem, what must be read and covered in a literature review, or what was meant by some comment I didn't understand. I didn't put off giving my writing to my advisor and other readers or avoid talking to them because I thought that they didn't see things the same way as I do.




8. I have revised seriously, which involved responding to the comments of others. I came to see this not as bowing down to the views of others, but taking them in and working them into my own reflective inquiry until I could convey more powerfully to others what I'm about (which may have changed as a result of the reflective inquiry).




9. I have inquired and negotiated about formal standards, but gone on to develop and internalize my own criteria for doing work—criteria other than jumping through hoops set by the professor so I get a good grade.




10. I have approached the CCT synthesis course and the CCT program as works-in-progress, which means that, instead of harboring criticisms to submit after the fact, I have found opportunities to affirm what is working well and to suggest directions for further development.